I wonder if coffee would burn if I put it threw an IV?

I am so seriously exhausted. I TRIED to go to bed early. We layed in bed and watched AGT, and I fell asleep before it was over, but woke up every hour. I swear. I don't know why. I took PM's last night. I just woke up. Constantly. Then I woke up at 0413 and got up, since my alarm was gonna go off soon anyways.
I like (when I say 'like' it is VERY relative, because I would rather stay in bed) to get up an hour and a half before I have to leave to take the girls to daycare. I like to drink coffee, possibly eat some Cornflakes or Cheerios (or just drink a slimfast on the way there), and 'wake up'. I usually run a straightener thru my hair (I wash it at night so I don't have to blow dry it.).

Vin got paid twice. Hmm....not that I mind. One was four something, the other was his normal 40 hour/wk paycheck. The four something is not big enough to be his Ins. Reimbursement check we get on the first (and it's not the first, yet), so I was wondering if it was his vacay days he got paid out? To bad he is sleeping. I am almost tempted to wake him up and ask him, cuz I told him to get 3 days paid out. No more. We need extra 'wiggle' room incase the girls get sick on a clinical day, and I can't stay home with them. Or if he gets sick. Or just so we have a little extra money for when he gets laid off. But no, somehow I doubt he listened to me, and got them all paid out. In that case, I will be upset. I pay the bills (physically, not make the money. yet.), and I know what is due, and when, and what we can get by paying, and what has to get paid during layoff and what we can due to get by. And it would have been nice to have a couple extra hundred dollars dispersed the week he gets laid off when we have a week without a paycheck from unemployment.

I can't wait to start working. But frankly, after yesteredays GBE lecture, I am terrified. It talked about the graduate nurse (that's all that class is), and how they go thru all these stressful phases before they 'fit in'. The first one was called something or another "shock", and one was called "burnout". Geez. that is making me look forward to being a nurse.....

5South is a busy floor. Lots of GI stuff going on.

oh that reminds me. My dream of graduating and going straight to the NICU? Nix on that. most likely. I can go straight to the Maternal/Child floors, (altho i'm sure lots of ppl want to do that), but they prolly wont hire me with NO hospital experience. maybe if I had been even a Nurse's Aide, but, nope. I have none. I can't get hospital experience. I can't afford to pay daycare on a NA salary, if I don't have to.  So, I was thinking 4South. Oncology. I LOVED working on that floor. Made me feel like I had a purpose. But that floor you get "compassion weakness" or something faster. meaning you lose compassion for people because you see so much sickness/death. I like 6North as well. just a Med/Surg. but lots of interesting things. We'll see how I like 5South. Maybe I'll even suck it up and go to Golisano's (Pediatric Hospital at Upstate). I would love to do Ped's Oncology, but I'd like to get my foot in the door at Crouse, so I can get into the NICU after a year. Sigh.

It all seems so close. Less than 4 months till we Graduate. Our GBE clinical is the first/second/3rd week of Dec. 64 hours in 2 weeks, different shifts, with a preceptor that is on a floor that we can request (I requested Maternal/child or 4South or 6North), and we work up to being able to handle a full pt. load. When I say "handle", I mean just that. Handle. Not do well, not do it prettily. Just do it. They don't (thank God) expect us to be able to do it well. Just to do it, to the best we can.

Crouse has a 98% pass rate the first time on the NCLEX. Way higher than any other school. A) they are the best Nursing School in NY and B) They DO NOT pass you unless they know you will pass the NCLEX and are COMPLETELY ready for the "real world".

Okay. I am going to get ready to go to clinical. My first day. kinda terrified. My Pt. is easy. I will get another later today, Cathie (my instructor) wanted to give us just one in the morning so we can get used to the floor and where things are. I am just Terrified cuz Idk what to expect of Cathie on the floor. She is great in class...but some instructors turn into monsters on the floor (all for our own good) but, still. I have heard horror stories about 280 clinicals. They expect us to know/do everything. or something. idk. The rumors are different that what they tell us. Obviously. So, IDK who to believe. sigh.

Here goes nothing.