Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.

"Frankly, I wonder who Frank was, and why he has an adverb all to himself."


I love 'Gone with the Wind'. It may be my all time favorite movie/book. I am trying to find a copy of it on swap tree. The book. I have the movie. The above quote, is from "house rules", from one of my most favorite authors. The quote from Gone with the Wind made me think of the quote from House Rules. I am a quotes girl. I love quotes. There are always perfect quotes/lyrics to describe everything. In like 7 words or less. I think that quotes from Fight Club are my favorite. 


If I could wake up in a different place, at a different time, could I wake up as a different person?


I read this book when I was a senior. I quickly fell in love with it. My life was going no where. I was doing nothing. I had no family, my friends were all going off to college, and lets face it, most of my friends were hardly friends. We were just people who hung out to pass time. I had few real friends. So, I took that quote literally. The first chance I had to get out of that place, I took it. I left. I left everything and everyone I knew, except Jordan and his crazy, alcoholic, psychotic family. I moved to a county smack in the middle of the Bible belt. A county that has been alcohol free since the prohibition.


I re-invented myself. I was fun. I was problem free. I had no responsibilities except rent and car payments/insurance. I got a job and met some of the best people ever. Two different kinds of people. A group of three, that worked the day shift, that were fun, and we would hang out and talk about stuff like books and movies. A group of people who were there to meet me at Waffle House in the middle of the night when I had a crisis with Jordan's psychotic mother. Then the other group were the the people who worked the night shift. Mostly the friends of my best friend down there. Who gave me my first real experience with the ghetto; not being able to walk outside alone. Having to have him meet me at my car when I got there, and walk me back out to my car. It was a whole different world that was not far from the world we lived in, a upper-middle class community. He was black and tall and horribly in love with me, and I loved feeling like I was the most important person in the world to someone. We hung out with his friends, or just alone, we talked, we went on random drives to random place with random people. We talked some more. We smoked. We had fun. His house was my safe haven from Jordan's family. I could just hang out and be me. We didn't even have to talk. I could just be. That was the first place I went when I found out I was pregnant, while waiting to meet the day shift friends. I brought the day shift and the night shift people together. I was able to be close friends with two completely different types of people. I have always been like that. I like it. I love talking about things like books and school and normal stuff, and I loved having fun and partying and smoking when I was younger. I was a completely different person in Fl. I had wonderful friends. But things were getting complicated. I ended up pregnant, sleeping on the couch of a crackhead and living out of my car. So, obviously I went back to Jordan's. That was hardly better. So, I came home to my family. It took a while, but I discovered who I was. The real me, and I am happy with my life. I am happy at school, and I love looking forward to my future with my kids, my husband, and being a nurse, and hopefully someday, a Nurse Practitioner. So, 'Yes' is the answer to that quote.


Tomorrow is Karina's 8th birthday party. Her real birthday is Sunday, on Father's day. I can hardly believe she is 8. Holy Moly. She is so funny. A spitting image of my brother, personality wise. It's so funny how much she acts like him. 


For Father's day I made my dad 2 8x10 collage's of pictures of all of us kids from birth up until now. He likes things like that, and I enjoy making them. Last year I made both him and Vin mugs that had pictures of everyone on them. I made Vin a collage of the girls also. He doesn't really care. We aren't big Father's/Mother's/Valentines day people. We don't even acknowledge Valentines day. I didn't even get a card on Mother's day. I don't like holiday's. Well, I like giving stuff, but I don't like receiving presents. It's weird. When I receive a present, I feel put on the spot, and I don't like it. Ha. I am so weird. I love LOVE giving people presents that I KNOW they are going to love. My dad is lucky I didn't see him before tomorrow, or I most likely would have given it to him, already. haha. Vin's is already hanging on the wall. I love my relationship with my parents, and I am lucky enough to have parents that I talk to on the phone everyday (except my dad. he works a lot, so we text. Altho a couple times a month we will have a long conversation or two on the phone.) We see them every other week or so, if not more. I love it.


On Sunday Jami, Thane and Rowan are coming over. I am making Sweet and Sour Chicken. I am thoroughly excited. By now I feel comfortable around them, so I am more excited than nervous. I bought Apples to Apples. Maybe we can play it Sunday. Vin does not like playing games with me (unless it's a sex game. haha), he says I am to competitive. Well, games were made to have a winner. so. Whatever. We don't like doing much together. Besides watching our tv shows or movies at night, camping, and sex. ha. We are an odd pair. I don't know how we made it this far. But, I am glad. He is a wonderful man. 


This morning, I woke up. I was thinking about France, and my passport and stuff. Then I started thinking about the No Fly list. What if a person was on the No Fly list, but this person was an identical twin. Couldn't they just take their twins passport and stuff and get on the plane and kill us all? Ha. Ok. A little dramatic, but isn't that feasible? Yeah. The places my brain takes me. 


Well, I have managed to write an entire book on here. About nothing. Until tomorrow, <3